Brigadoon: Decomposed

Brigadoon
music by Frederick Loewe
lyrics and book by Alan Jay Lerner
based on a myth that was either Scottish, or German, or both

YE OLDE FOREST O' EXPOSITIONE

(Enter two Americans, Tommy and Jeff, who chat expositionally.)

TOMMY: Wow, Jeff, we sure are LOST. We came all the way from NEW YORK and we got LOST in SCOTLAND.
JEFF: Yes, quite. And I drink.
TOMMY: I can't believe how LOST we are. Also, I'm having reservations about my upcoming marriage.
JEFF: I drink A LOT.

(Suddenly, Misty Mystical Highland voices call out to them.)

MISTY MYSTICAL HIGHLAND VOICES: Brigadoon...Brigadoon...We sing about ourselves for no reason, Brigadoon...
JEFF: Damn, this whiskey is starting to kick in.
TOMMY: Omigod, look! A little village that totally wasn't there five minutes ago! Let's check it out.
JEFF: My drunkeness prevents me from arguing out of this. Okay, let's go.

(And the only plausible bit in the show is over.)

Brigadoon

(And...we have a title! We're in Brigadoon: the charmingingly time-displaced Scottish town of the 1740's, a halcyon time marked by it's love of spontaneous musical numbers.

So, the Brigadoon...ian..ites are fairing it up, and there's a general excitement about the forthcoming nuptials of the charming JEAN MACLAREN and CHARLIE DALRYMPLE, who, in spite of his awkward last name is still charming.

Speaking of awkward, JEAN strikes up a conversation with her ex, HARRY BEATON who is not very charming.)

JEAN: So...Harry...how are things?
HARRY BEATON: Oh, fine.
JEAN: Really?
HARRY: Yeah. Fine. I can never go to college to do something meaningful with my life, and now I’m stuck watching you be some other man’s wife for all eternity. SURE! EVERYTHING’S PEACHY-F#$%ING-KEEN!
JEAN: ...So, does that mean you're not coming to the wedding?
HARRY: Wha-??? Buh??? Nnnnnnnnngggggghhh, GODDAMNIT WOMAN! (leaves in huff)
JEAN: Well...that went okay.

(JEAN'S dad, who likes the sound of his own voice, makes some official announcement:)

MACLAREN: Let me remind you to give thanks for the MIRACLE that took place two days ago, because surely you would have forgotten by now.

(Meanwhile: FIONA, the charming sister of the charming JEAN goes shopping. She buys milk from MEG, who's the Town Haggis: everyone's had a peice.)

MEG: Hey there, Fiona! How’re the wedding preparations going?
FIONA: Fine, Meg. How’s the slutting going?
MEG: As good as can be expected. By the way, when are you gonna get hitched?
FIONA: When someone comes along who makes me think of marriage.
MEG: Isn’t that a little difficult considering-
FIONA: I SAID, "WHEN SOMEONE COMES ALONG WHO MAKES ME THINK OF MARRIAGE."
MEG: Whatever.

(And right on cue, Tommy and Jeff enter)

MEG: Someone I haven't slept with yet! Sweet!
BRIGADOON...IAN...ITES: (unsubtle staring)
TOMMY: Uh, hi. We are kinda lost...so...if you could help us out with that...that would be...great...
BRIGADOON...IAN...ITES: (still staring; but charmingly)
JEFF: Aw, screw this. Let's go find us a HoJo and a martini.
FIONA: Wait, you can't leave.
TOMMY: Why not?
FIONA: Because then we wouldn't have a show. Stay here and share subtle, 1940's sexual tension with me.
TOMMY: Okay.
MEG: I'll take the one who smells like scotch.

(Meg drags Jeff off towards impending sex.)

TOMMY: I better call the hotel. Can I use a telephone?
FIONA: Quoi?
TOMMY: A phone. Can I use a telephone?
FIONA: A what-a-what?
TOMMY: (loudly) NEC. CES. IT. O. TEL. E. FO. NO.
FIONA: Don’t patronize me, sir. We don’t have a damn phone.
TOMMY: What? What the hell kinda place is this, anyway?
FIONA: (changing the subject) Oh, look! It’s that guy who’s going to marry my sister later! You must meet him.
(Enter CHARLIE DALRYMPLE, he of the unfortunate last name. They all start drinking at like 9:00 AM, but I guess it's never too early to drink in the Highlands, eh?

Kidding! Don't hate me, Scottish people!)

CHARLIE: A toast: to Brigadoon, Mr. Forsythe, the MIRACLE, etc. SALUD!
TOMMY: Mirawhuh?
FIONA: No talking. It's drinky time.

(FIONA and TOMMY exit. CHARLIE sings a song about his bachelor life. It's quite long, actually. It goes into several refrains. He's the male version of Meg. Still, he is charming, so all is forgiven.

Oh, there's also a dance sequence where HARRY tries to pick up a girl and fails miserably. Then everyone clears the stage and FIONA and TOMMY saunter back on picking up where we left off.)

TOMMY: So, I guess that whole scene was...rather pointless?
FIONA: Pretty much. Yeah.

(beat)

TOMMY: So...why is everyone around so corsetty and waistcoaty and two hundred years out of place?
FIONA: ...I have no idea what you're talking about.
TOMMY: I'm just saying, it's a little weird.
FIONA: What? You're
the one who's weird.
TOMMY: Say what? You're nuts, and so is everybody else here.
FIONA: SAY THAT AGAIN ABOUT MY TOWN AND I'LL CRACK YO ASS, BITCH!

(beat)

TOMMY: ...Dude!
FIONA: (calming down) Sorry. I just get a little defensive about my people. I was just keeping it real, yo.
TOMMY: Okay...so, you...wanna hang out or something?
FIONA: Oh, I can't. I've got a millions things to do, and-
TOMMY: (sings:) Can't we two go walkin' together,
out beyond the valley of trees?
Out where there's a hillside of heather,
curtsyin' gently in the breeze.
That's what I'd like to do: see the heather-but with you...

(pause)

What the hell was that?
FIONA: Oh, it's just this place. It does that to you.
TOMMY: Oh.
FIONA: Actually, I could use a little company. Come with me. I will tell you about Scottish life and you can tell me about those teeth on your pockets.
TOMMY: Those are zippers.

MEG'S YE OLDE SHACKE O' SLUTTERY

(JEFF and MEG have stopped to "rest".)

MEG: ...and my mother conceived me in this very shack. Right in the very bed we're sitting on right now.
JEFF: Great. I'll try not to think about that as I go to sleep.
MEG: But, wait. Don't you want to...talk? (cough, cough)sexnow(cough)
JEFF: What?
MEG: Me so horny. Me love you long time.
JEFF: Uh, no thank you.
MEG: Huh? I'm sitting here with my legs akimbo and you're not going to do a thing about it? What gives, man?
JEFF: ...Got any whiskey?

(Aaaaaand, scene.)

CASA DE MACLAREN

(All the womenfolk help JEAN pack for her honeymoon, because apparently everyone in Brigadoon has nothing better to do than to help out with this wedding.)

CHARLIE: Hello, Mr. MacLaren! I’m here to sign the family plotpoint.
MACLAREN: Oh, you mean the bible? Help yourself! And please feel free to use the other room where it’ll be easier to concentrate. Yes.

(CHARLIE does so, which allows HARRY to get his whine on.)

HARRY: It's not fair! I'm stuck forever in this shite-pile of a town.
MACLAREN: Yeah. And don't forget that part about some other dude marrying my daughter, whom you love. That really must suck.
HARRY: WAH! I wish I could leave! I wish this whole town would just dissappear!

(HARRY exits in a huff. CHARLIE enters without having heard a word of the preceding conversation.)

CHARLIE: (returning) Wow, it took a lot longer to sign my name than one would expect. Is everything okay?
MACLAREN: Wha-? Oh yeah. Everything’s fine. Nothing happened in here that will come back to bite us in the ass later.
CHARLIE: Cool. Should I put this bible away?
MACLAREN: No, just leave it out here. I’m sure it won’t be found by any time-travelling Americans and completely give away our game.

(TOMMY and FIONA return from the field where they've been collecting heather all day. If you want to find a euphemism in there, happy hunting, my friend.)

TOMMY: Well, collecting heather certainly is invigorating, isn't it?
FIONA: Yes, it is.

(They make out. A lot. I would say they're over their earlier awkwardness.

FIONA leaves and JEFF enters sporting a pair of plaid pants from L.L. Bean's Post-Coital Collection.)

TOMMY: Dude, what happened to your pants?
JEFF: I tore them on a "thistle". A really slutty "thistle". And what have you been doing all day?
TOMMY: Well, not much, but I feel...(sings:)
All the music of life seems to be
like a bell that is ringing for me!
And from the way that I feel when that bell starts to peal,
I could swear I was falling, I would swear I was falling,
It's almost like being in love!!!
JEFF: ...What the hell was that?

(But Tommy doesn’t answer because he has just noticed the family plotpoint bible, and starts to read it:)

BIBLE: Fiona MacLaren was born in seventeen-twenty-something. Yes, the very name of the very girl you’ve been macking on all day.
TOMMY: (reads)
BIBLE: And her little sister is marrying that dude, Charlie, on this date. Only, not this exact date, because according to this Bible it’s 200 years ago.
TOMMY: (wheels...turning...)
BIBLE: AND DIDN’T YOU NOTICE THAT THERE’S NO ELECTRICITY OR PHONE OR RUNNING WATER AND EVERYONE DRESSES IN CORSETS AND STUFF? ARE YOU STUPID OR SOMETHING???
TOMMY: ...Hey, something's not right.
FIONA: (entering) Hey Tommy! What do you want to (notices Bible)...oh, shit.
TOMMY: Um...Fiona...is there...something you want to tell me?
FIONA: Okay, fine. I’ll take you to Mr. Lundie who will tell you everything.
TOMMY: Why do you have to take me to him?
FIONA: Because he has a PhD in Backstory.

WHEREVER LUNDIE HANGS OUT WHEN THE STRESS OF BEING CHARMING BECOMES TOO MUCH

FIONA: 'Sup, Mr. Lundie.
LUNDIE: 'Sup.
FIONA: These are some Americans I met like forty-five minutes ago. I was wondering if you can tell them all about the super-secret MIRACLE of Brigadoon.
LUNDIE: Okay, here’s the deal: 200 years ago the highlands of Scotland were plagued by witches that may or may not have actually existed. Mr. Forsythe, the town minister, and I discussed the problem and came to the obvious solution...
JEFF: You burned hundreds of people at the stake without benefit of charge or trial?
LUNDIE: (silence)
FIONA: I told you we should have done that!
LUNDIE: Aaaanyway, we decided the best solution was to pray to God for a MIRACLE: to make Brigadoon and everything and everyone in it dissappear and then return for exactly one day every hundred years because...that makes sense...on some planet...in some galaxy...that we haven’t yet discovered...
TOMMY: It’s okay. We left plausibility back in the woods. I believe you.
LUNDIE: Oh good! So, Mr. Forsythe waited until Charlie came back from school so that nothing would go wrong with the wedding and just assumed that everyone else would be okay with this. He prayed to God on a hilltop away from Brigadoon because he wanted to make the sacrifice to save his town. Or something. At any rate, we never saw him again, and that’s sad. Also, he asked God that if anyone were ever to leave, the entire town would dissappear forever. I don’t ever see that becoming a problem. He also made sure that if an outsider (cough, cough) fell in love (cough, cough) with anyone who lived in Brigadoon (cough, cough) he could stay.
TOMMY: You okay there? Do you need a glass of water or something?
LUNDIE: I said IF AN OUTSIDER FELL IN LOVE WITH ANYONE WHO LIVED IN BRIGADOON HE COULD STAY!
TOMMY: Dude, I heard you the first time! Why are you shouting?
LUNDIE: Whatever. In time you will come to understand...preferably sometime before we go back into cryogenic slumber.
FIONA: Oh yikes! I gotta go get changed for the wedding.
TOMMY: Oh right: wedding! Jeff, do you want to stay to see it? (tauntingly) Open bar...
JEFF: Oh fine.

(FIONA leaves. LUNDIE has a moment with our heroes.)

LUNDIE: You know, sometimes when I sleep at night, I can hear voices crying out for a Brigadoon of their own.
VOICES: AaaaahhhhhaaaahhhAAAHHHAAAHHHaaahhhaaahhhAAAAAAHHHH!
JEFF: ...the hell was that all about?
LUNDIE: Oh, nothing really. It was just covering a costume change. Actually, forget I said anything.

THE WEDDING

(The whole town has showed up for JEAN and CHARLIE's wedding. It's the event of the century, for real!)

LUNDIE: We don’t have a minister, so why don’t why don't you just pledge eternal love and we'll just take it from there.
JEAN: I love you, and stuff.
CHARLIE: I love you, and more stuff.
LUNDIE: I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Weirdlastname.
JEAN AND CHARLIE: WOOT! (eat each other’s faces)

(Everyone parties like it's 1799. Even HARRY has caught the spirit and sworddances with the other mens. Kilts go flying to dangerous levels. All is love and light and happiness and kilts...until HARRY breaks formation, grabs JEAN and rapes her face with his tongue.)

CHARLIE: Oi! That's my wife! Get your own.

(CHARLIE administers a two-fisted beatdown to HARRY, who then pulls out a small blade which holds back the entire town even though there were about a dozen swords onstage two minutes ago.)

SOMEWHERE DEEP IN THE FOREST

PLAUSIBILITY: Hello? I think I was left behind. Little help? Somebody?

BACK AT THE WEDDING

HARRY: Man, I have had enough of all this backwoods mystical shit, I am so out of here!
TOWNSFOLK: Omigod! None of us saw this coming since scene two!
JEAN: Harry, I might have gone out with you, but you just weren't very charming.
HARRY: EFF YOU! EFF YOU, AND F@#$ YOU! (leaves in a huff)

(The citizens freeze in panic. Shock! Horror! The future of Brigadoon hangs in the balance! So much excitement! And curtain.)

ACT II

YE OLDE FOREST OF SUSPENSEFUL CHOREOGRAPHYE

(The menfolk are in hot persuit of runaway HARRY. They search the entire forest, yet somehow keep coming back to one stage-sized clearing in the woods.)

MENFOLK: (Chase, chase, chase!)
HARRY: Run, run, run!
TOMMY: Oh my God! We’ve got to help save the town! It means more to me than life!
JEFF: Hey, up until today you didn’t even know this place existed.
TOMMY: Just help me look for him, Sloshed McShitfaced!
MENFOLK: (Chase, chase, chase!)
HARRY: (Run, run, run!)
ANGUS: You guys go that way, I'll go this way.
SOME SCOT: Will we catch him faster if we dance so that our kilts fly up to indecent levels?
ANGUS: ...yes.
MENFOLK: (Chase, chase, chase!)
HARRY: (Run, run, run!)
KILTS: (go flying)
AUDIENCE: (sees London, sees France...)
MENFOLK: (Chase!)
HARRY: (Run!)
MENFOLK: (Chase!)
HARRY: (Run!)
MENFOLK: (Chase!)
HARRY: (Run!)
MENFOLK: (Chase!)
HARRY: (Run! RunrunrunRUUUUNNNN!)
TOMMY: MY GOD WILL NOTHING STOP HIM?!?!
OFF-STAGE VOICE: AAAUUUGGGHHHHHH!!!

(SOME SCOT carries on Harry; he's really dead.)

SOME SCOT: Looks like he tripped and hit his head on a rock...or something.
TOMMY: Wow, how convenient.
ANGUS: Yeah, we couldn’t have planned that better if we tried.
STUART: Look, there’s no reason to let this ruin the wedding party. Let’s wait until tomorrow to tell everyone.
TOMMY: You mean a hundred years later when he’s completely decomposed?
STUART: Yeah...something like that.

BACK AT BRIGADOON

MACLAREN: Alright, everyone! We caught Harry. Show’s over, nothing to see here.
ARCHIE BEATON: Where is my son? Did he get hurt?
MACLAREN: (shiftily) No, and he certainly didn’t die in the woods back there. I don’t know why you would think that.
FIONA: Tommy? Tommy, where are you? Angus, where's Tommy?
ANGUS: Who's Tommy?
FIONA: Tommy! Where's Tommy?
ANGUS: Where's Tommy? You mean Who's Tommy?
FIONA: No! Where's Tommy?
ANGUS: Well, if Where's Tommy, Who's on first?
FIONA: What?
ANGUS: Huh?
FIONA: WHERE IS THE TIME-TRAVELLING AMERICAN WITH THE DRUNK FRIEND?!?!
ANGUS: Oh, him. He's over there.
TOMMY: Hi.
FIONA: TOMMY! I was so worried! I thought you weren't coming back.
TOMMY: Of course I came back. Fiona...
FIONA: Yes, Tommy?
TOMMY: I have something to tell you.
FIONA: What is it, Tommy?
TOMMY: Well...(sings:)
I saw a man with his head bowed low.
His heart had no place to go.
I looked and I thought to myself with a sigh:
There but for you go I.
I saw a man walking by the sea,
Alone with the tide was he.
I looked and I thought as I watched him go by:
There but for you go I...
FIONA: Tommy, stop singing and tell me what you wanted to tell me.
TOMMY: (stops singing) Huh? Oh. I love you, Fiona.
FIONA: WOOT! I love you, too! Come on, let's go find Mr. Lundie and see what we have to do.
TOMMY: Can't I finish my song first?
FIONA: I really don't think we have ti-
TOMMY: (sings:)
I saw a man who had never known
a love that was all his own.
I thought as I thanked all the stars in the sky:
There, but for you, go I.
FIONA: Are you finished?
TOMMY: Yes.
FIONA: Good. Let's go.

THE WEDDING PARTY, CONT.

(Having apparently forgotten all about their brush with death, the Brigadooners have gone back to partying. MEG regales all with a chapter from "Les Contes des Slutwomann.")

MEG: Y'all think this wedding was nuts? Shoot, my mom's wedding turned into a drunken, violent orgy. And I know, because I was there. Ahh, memories.
BRIGADOONIES: Ha-ha! Tell us another one, Aunt Meg!

(Tales of ribaldry will have to wait for another time, as the lights turn down and the music of bagpipes fill the air. The corpse of HARRY is carried onto stage on a litter. I guess the idea for concealing his untimely demise did not go according to plan.

MAGGIE, that chick HARRY tried to hit on earlier, does a mourny dance of deathly death. ARCHIE BEATON cries. It is very very very sad.)

THE DALRYMPLE HOUSEHOLD, 50 (5000) YEARS LATER

JEAN: ...and that's the story of how your grandfather and I got married.
GRANDKIDS: Wow, Grandma. That sucks.

THE WEDNERAL

(The funeral procession follows HARRY'S body offstage. JEFF and TOMMY have been watching the entire time.)

JEFF: Sad stuff. Makes me wish I didn't kill that kid.
TOMMY: YOU WHAT???
JEFF: I didn't mean to. I kinda accidentally on purpose tripped him and a rock smushed his head in, or something.
TOMMY: Oh my God, that's terrible.
JEFF: Yeah. Still, no use crying over spilt haggis. Let's blow.
TOMMY: Actually, I'm going to stay.
JEFF: WHA-???
TOMMY: I'm in love with Fiona, and I'm going to stay with her here until the end of time.
JEFF: Okay, first of all, at the rate our planet's going, I'm guessing you two have a week, two weeks tops. Secondly, you can't just up and leave everything! What about your friends? Your family? Your drinking buddy? Jane?
TOMMY: Who's Jane?
JEFF: YOUR FIANCE.
TOMMY: Fiona makes me feel things I've never felt with Jane. I feel happier, more alive, I burst out into song...
JEFF: Yeah, about that: that's become really annoying.
TOMMY: I love Fiona, I'm staying and that's that.
JEFF: FINE! You stay here in North Bumblef***. I hope you'll be very happy without toilets, electricity, and Vietnamese food. Just don't come crying to me tomorrow when you realize you've made a mistake, BECAUSE I'LL BE DEAD. (leaves)
FIONA: (entering) Tommy, what was that all about?
TOMMY: Fiona, I'm sorry. I can't go through with it. I just need more time.
FIONA: I understand.
TOMMY: You do?
FIONA: No, but it seemed like the right thing to say.
TOMMY: Fiona?
FIONA: Yes, Tommy?
TOMMY: Will you...burst out into song with me...one last time?
FIONA: Of course.
TOMMY & FIONA: (sing:)
Through all the years to come,
and through all the tears to come,
I know I'll be yours from this day on.

(MISTY MYSTICAL HIGHLAND VOICES sing softly as FIONA and Brigadoon are swallowed in the mist.)

FIONA: (dissappearing) Remember me...remember the love that we shared...try not to have sex with anyone...

(And, she is gone. TOMMY wanders offstage as if waking from a dream. Curtain.

Ha! Just kidding. There's still more show.)

NEW YORK, A BAR, THREE MONTHS LATER

JEFF: I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly...
BARTENDER FRANK: So, where is Mr. Tommy?
JEFF: I dunno. We got back from Scotland, and then he took off and no one has heard from him.
BARTENDER FRANK: That's strange.
JEFF: You want to know something strange? I'm beginning to see the bottom of my glass.

(Then, TOMMY walks in. Omigod, this is so unexpected!)

JEFF: Tommy! (hic) How the hell are ya?
TOMMY: Not so good, actually. I miss Scotland, I miss Brigadoon...and I miss Fiona.
JEFF: Oh Christ, you're not going to start singing again, are you?

(Just then, JANE, TOMMY's fiancee, enters.)

JANE: OMIGODTOMMY!
JEFF: Uh-oh. It's the old ball 'n chain. I'm not sticking around for this. Good luck, Tommygun.

(JEFF wanders drunkenly offstage. JANE begins to berate TOMMY.)

JANE: And just where the hell have you been these past three months?
TOMMY: I dunno. Doin' stuff.
JANE: Well, I hope you're ready to start planning for the wedding because I've been working my ass off...

(JANE's voice dissappears as TOMMY's memory is awakened.)

MEMORY GHOST FIONA: SAY THAT AGAIN ABOUT MY TOWN AND I'LL CRACK YO ASS, BITCH!

(Then, Tommy realizes: HE'S MADE A MISTAKE.)

TOMMY: What have I done? Jane, I can't marry you.
JANE: Are you shitting me?
TOMMY: I'm sorry.
JANE: You're sorry? You leave me hanging for three months, then out of the blue break up our engagement, and you're sorry?! Well, you can take your "sorry" and shove it up your-
MEMORY GHOST CHARLIE: (sings of the bachelor life.)
TOMMY: 'The hell? Why am I fantasizing about Charlie? I wasn’t even there for that song!
JANE: ...Until the handle breaks off, and you've got to get a surgeon to pull it out again! GOODBYE!
MEMORY GHOST FIONA: Remember me. Remember the love we shared. Remember. Siiiimbaaaa....

(TOMMY springs into action. He calls JEFF, who is just sober enough to ensure his participation in an upcoming trip to Scotland. He's going back! Woo!)

TOMMY: The only woman I ever loved! She’s not dead but I can’t ever be with her again!
JEFF: Yeah, sucks to be you. Can we go now?
TOMMY: Not yet. Just let me look a little longer.
JEFF: Dude, we are so breaking up.

(They are about to leave when suddenly...can it be? The MISTY MYSTICAL HIGHLAND VOICES??? That can only mean one thing...)

LUNDIE: (entering:) Oi! Keep it down, some of us are trying to sleep.
FIONA: (entering:) TOMMY!
TOMMY: FIONA!

(TOMMY goes off with FIONA, Brigadoon dissappears back into the mists, JEFF is alone with his booze, as it was meant to be.)

JEFF: Wait...who's going to drive me home?

(Curtain.)

©2005 Musical Decomposition

The Lion King: Decomposed

The Lion King
Music by Elton John (and others)
Lyrics by Tim Rice (and others)
Book by Rodger Allers and Irene Mecchi (based on the screenplay by Irene Mecchi, Jonathan Roberts and Linda Woolvertoon)
Notes: I actually have never seen the staged version of "The Lion King", but I have seen the movie and clips on the Tony's. I'm pretty sure that's qualification enough. Anyway, even if I did see the show, I'm sure I could not have come up with anything other than what you are about to read.


ACT I:

RAFIKI: We’re gonna see lions, only in Kenya! (presents Baby Puppet Simba to Animal Puppet Chorus)

ANIMAL PUPPET CHORUS: Lions and tigers only in Kenya! (bow)

YOUNG SIMBA: We’re gonna see tigers

YOUNG NALA: Only in Kenya!

ZAZU: (rolling little birdy eyes) Lions and tigers only in Kenya!

SCAR: (schemes evilly, to hyena minions:) We’ve got Norway.

MUFASA: (falling off cliff:) Kenya!

YOUNG SIMBA: (running away, crying:) Oh, Kenya!

TIMON: Where the giraffes are...

PUMBA: And the zebra!


ACT II:

NALA: Kenya!

RAFIKI: Kenya!

GIANT DEAD MUFASA: Kenya!

SIMBA: (returning home:) Kenya!

SCAR: Kenya! (falls into pit of ravenous hyenas, dies)

SIMBA: (assuming his rightful place as king:) We’re goin’ to Kenya!

ANIMAL PUPPET CHORUS: KENYA BELIEVE IT!